Santa Cheese & Charcuterie Board – Easy Christmas Appetizer
Let Me Tell You About The Santa Board That Almost Went Terribly Wrong (But Didn’t)
Okay, so straight up: the first time I tried making a Santa cheese & charcuterie board, I was convinced my salami beard would end up looking more like a melted octopus than the North Pole’s most famous guy. And maybe I snuck more cheese cubes than I should have while assembling. Can you blame me? It’s cheese. Anyway, after some harmless panicking (and my dog grabbing a cracker off the corner), it turned out pretty adorable if I do say so myself. Kids immediately tried to poke the olive eyes out. Figures.
Why I Keep Making This (Even When I Swear I Won’t Next Year)
I make this every Christmas Eve when I already feel like a tinsel-covered tornado. And honestly, my family goes a little bonkers for it—people love picking at it while we finish up last-minute wrapping (or watching yet another re-run of Elf). Also, it’s just fun to arrange, especially after a glass of something sparkly. If you’ve got snack fiends in the house, this is your secret ticket to five minutes’ peace—or at least some distracted nibbling. My only frustration is when the red peppers run away from the hat, but I learned to just wedge them back in and carry on.
What Goes into My Santa Board (& Some Real-Life Swaps)
- Soft white cheese (brie or mozzarella balls): I usually use brie, but honestly a handful of mozzarella pearls does the trick in a pinch. Cream cheese works too if you smoosh it a bit.
- Red deli meat (salami, pepperoni, or prosciutto): I tend to go pepperoni, but prosciutto is easier to shape if you’re fussy. My grandma swore by Genoa salami, but you use what you like—no one is grading you.
- Red bell pepper: For the hat. Sometimes I use roasted pepper from a jar (less chopping, more flavor!)
- Black olives: For eyes and nose. One of my friends used raisins once and, well, I don’t recommend—that was a taste surprise nobody wanted.
- Crackers: Whatever is on hand. I once used Ritz and Wheat Thins together and nobody complained.
- Cherry tomatoes: For color pops (and because I like to snack as I go).
- Optional extras: Grapes, dried apricots, nuts—pretty much whatever’s rolling around the back of the pantry.
Here’s How I Throw It Together (Honestly, Sometimes I Make It Up As I Go)
- Find a big platter (or wooden board, or just use a clean baking sheet—who cares, it’s covered anyway).
- Build the beard. Spread the brie wedges or pile the mozzarella balls in a fluffy shape—just kind of squint at it and think Santa.
- Make his hat. Red deli meat in a triangle above the beard. Tuck in some sliced bell peppers for extra color. (It always looks a bit weird at this stage, but trust the process!)
- Add his face. Make a little face section with a round of brie, maybe a composite of slices if you have to, and stick two olive halves on for eyes. Cherry tomato or another olive for his nose – whatever looks the cutest, really.
- Line up crackers around the edge, or pile them off to the side if you’re short on space. (This is usually where I steal a taste or two, just being honest…)
- Scatter extras. Grapes, tomatoes, dried fruit—basically the patchwork quilt of snacks. If it rolls, it goes.
- Step back and admire (or fuss with it). Maybe add more deli meat if the hat needs help, or double up on cheese if your crowd is hungry; you do you.
Some Notes, Because I’ve Messed Up Enough Times
- The ‘Santa face’ never looks perfect. I once tried to use a cookie cutter on the cheese face and it got so stuck I had to eat my way out (not the worst problem).
- If you make this ahead, keep the board covered with cling film or a giant bowl so the cheese doesn’t dry out. I forgot once and ended up with a crusty Santa beard. Won’t do that again.
- Don’t overthink the shape. It’s about fun more than symmetry! Lean into the chaos (and maybe have an extra olive ready for repairs).
Variations I’ve Tried (and One ‘Oof’ Moment)
- Veggie Santa: Used strips of roasted red pepper for the hat and cauliflower florets for the beard. Actually looked cute, but kind of bland (dip helps).
- Dessert Santa: Swapped cheese and meat for mini marshmallows and strawberries; honestly too sweet, and the hat kept falling off. Live and learn!
- Spicy Santa: Tossed in spicy capicola—bit of a gamble, but surprisingly tasty.
Gear I Grab (But Sometimes Improvise)
- Large platter or cheese board—if you don’t have one, a cookie sheet or even a huge cutting board does the trick; I’ve even built it right on baking parchment on the kitchen table before.
- Small knife for slicing, though I once used kitchen scissors in a pinch (works okay, just don’t tell my aunt).
- Mini tongs or toothpicks if you like being all fancy, but again, fingers work fine in my house.
Where to Stash It (If It Lasts, Which Is Rare)
So, technically, it’s best in the fridge with a bit of cling wrap over it—especially if you make it a few hours ahead. But truth be told, this never survives more than a single evening at our get-togethers. If you have leftovers (ha!), the cheese and meat tuck into sandwiches really nicely the next day. Or, you know, a midnight snack. Your call.
How I Serve It (And The Little Ritual That’s Grown On Us)
I always put the Santa board out right before present opening—something about the mix of cheese and chaos seems to put everyone in a jolly mood. Sometimes I go all out with festive napkins and little cheese knives, but other years, it’s just piles of snacks and a stack of plates. If you want to up the fun factor, try some DIY toothpick flags or, heck, a mini Santa hat for the cheese face.
Stuff I’ve Learned the Hard Way (So You Don’t Have To)
- Rushing the beard layering leaves you with cheese pile-up (I once tried to finish in 5 minutes—nope).
- Don’t use really oily meats for the hat, or it’ll end up sliding all over the place and make your ‘Santa’ look like he’s melting.
- I used to think the whole thing had to be perfect—a little messiness makes it more inviting.
FAQ (Yep, Folks Ask These!)
- Can I make this dairy-free?
Absolutely, I tried a vegan cheese once and it held together just fine. The texture was a bit odd, I admit, but it looked super cute (and there’s always good vegan board inspo here). - Is it meant to look like Santa or just have his colors?
Both! Sometimes my ‘Santa’ looks a little more like a gnome, but the red-white vibe gets the point across. Nobody complained, just giggled. - Help, my cheese is melting!
Keep it cool until serving—and don’t put it under the sunlight (yep, did that once, won’t again). - What pairs well with the board?
We usually put out some sparkling cider or even mulled wine for the grownups—check out this mulled wine guide—and a little bowl of honey or fruit compote is a hit with the cheese. - Do I need fancy cheese for this?
Nope, use what’s on hand. Supermarket own brands work fine (my wallet thanks me for this every December, honestly).
PS: Totally unrelated, but you ever notice how Christmas snacks disappear four times faster than regular snacks? I chalk it up to festive magic (that, or my brother’s bottomless stomach).
Ingredients
- 8 oz white cheddar cheese, cubed
- 6 oz mini mozzarella balls
- 6 oz salami slices
- 6 oz prosciutto
- 1/2 cup cherry tomatoes
- 1/2 cup black olives
- 8 oz crackers
- Fresh rosemary sprigs, for garnish
Instructions
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1On a large board or platter, outline the shape of Santa’s face using white cheddar cheese cubes to form the base of the face.
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2Use mini mozzarella balls to create Santa’s beard and hat brim. Arrange them in a fluffy curve along the bottom and top of the face area.
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3Layer salami and prosciutto slices in a triangle above the face to form Santa’s red hat.
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4Place cherry tomatoes atop the salami triangle to add more red color to the hat, and use one tomato for Santa’s nose.
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5Use black olives to make Santa’s eyes. Add crackers around the edge of the board for serving.
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6Garnish with fresh rosemary sprigs for a festive touch and serve immediately.
Approximate Information for One Serving
Nutrition Disclaimers
Number of total servings shown is approximate. Actual number of servings will depend on your preferred portion sizes.
Nutritional values shown are general guidelines and reflect information for 1 serving using the ingredients listed, not including any optional ingredients. Actual macros may vary slightly depending on specific brands and types of ingredients used.
To determine the weight of one serving, prepare the recipe as instructed. Weigh the finished recipe, then divide the weight of the finished recipe (not including the weight of the container the food is in) by the desired number of servings. Result will be the weight of one serving.
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